Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Lame. So lame.

That is what I am, friends. Lame! I can't believe I didn't blog for the entire Christmas season! Here is my excuse: My husband was out of school! Because of this, I was busy busy chasing after two boys for a month. I think that is a valid reason.

So over the break, we played and played! Well, the boys played more than I did; I did more watching than playing. My health is improving in some ways, and worsening in other ways.

Quick health update before some seriously funny Levi moments. I have seen my doctor several times throughout this whole ordeal. She sent me to a neuro-urologist, a special neurologist and a neuro-ophthalmologist. Lots of doctor visits. Here are my symptoms and then we are moving on. Symptom # 1: Eye pain. The eye pain is usually semi-manageable, but there are days (like today) that I cannot even think because the pain is so severe. Eye pain is probably the worst pain I've had from MS. This could be/probably is due to permanent nerve damage from optic neuritis. Pain management is all we can do for that. Symptom #2: Fatigue. I know it sounds like no big deal, I mean, everyone gets fatigued. But I have days (like today again) that I cannot get out of bed. My body will not cooperate and it doesn't matter what is going on, I cannot get up. I cry a lot during these times. Before Christmas I was walking with a cane almost every day. Symptom #3: Electric shocks. These go from my head or shoulders down my body. When they are happening, sometimes my hands twitch and I can't hold a butter knife or put a straw into my Chick-fil-a sweet tea. My dexterity disappears. The doc thinks these are probably seizures. Bummer. I will update when I have some solid answers. Pray that they don't get worse. They are the most scary and uncomfortable symptom I've ever had.

Okay, so that is public enemies #s 1, 2, and 3. But I am NOT unhappy. I am Not letting Satan turn something God intends to be refining into something disheartening. By His grace I have been able to continue serving at church on the worship team, and I have been so blessed by them. They have helped me up and down the stairs, let me use chairs, and been understanding when I needed a mic stand for support while we were leading. God is so overwhelmingly good. He deliberately puts us in situations that call for total dependence on Him and his mercy. Then He powerfully administers His grace in unimaginable ways. I am in awe of Him daily. He quiets my anxious spirit and comforts my broken heart.

And the Word says that "our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ, who, by the power that enables him to bring everything under his control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body." I can hold out for that. I have Hope. And HE will not disappoint.

So on to Levi, who is probably the only reason anyone reads this blog anyway :) Its okay, I am getting used to being popular by way of my child. So Levi...I don't even know what to say about him. He is busy. And very...physical. He wears me out. The doc has told me that I need at least one, but preferably 2 days a week that I am not the sole caregiver. But I'm fearful that he will have killed me before those two days a week. He's EVERYWHERE. And he is precious. His favorite word right now is "Daddy" which he pronounces "Dad-dih." He also says "Mama" but only because he wants me to say "Levi" and then he repeats "Mama" and we go on and on like this. He loves balls, and is usually carrying one at all times. He got a bowling set for Christmas and enjoys knocking the pins over with his teeball bat. He loves is blue bear, which we affectionately call "Stinky Bear" because, well, he is very stinky. We wash him, soak him with oxyclean, but he is still stinky. And no other stuffed toy will do. Stinky Bear is starting to look very "Velveteen Rabbit"-ish. Maybe he will turn into a REAL 8 inch high blue bear.

Levi also loves baths. If the bathroom door opens for any reason, he is at the tub faster than I can catch him, with one leg already climbing in. When he does get in the bath he says "Bubbles!" He loves bubbles in his bath. He also loves his cousin Micah. He talks about Micah when he plays sometimes, but the name comes out "Cock." And when Micah hears Levi say cock, he says "Doo Doo." It is hilarious. Levi is a little rough for Micah right now, but I think they will grow into each other.

There is so much more to say, but this post is super long. I will start posting more often, and shorter posts. And pictures will come next time!

No comments: